Blind Date
by KakoimonoMiyu
Summary: Nny unwittingly signs up for a blind date contest and wins, and his date is none other than... ~DRAMATIC CHORD!~ ... You hafta read to find out! Mwaah. I'm mean.
1. Part I: Those Skettios Cans Are Mighty C...

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Blind Date

Disclaimer! Yaaay! Okay, Jhonen owns Nny, a'course… Sigh… That's really not fair. Anyway, I know I should be working on the other fics, but this just sorta popped into my head last night, so I had to write it. I _had_ to. Lemme alone. Oh, and I put somethin' in Originals Fantasy called Celestial Dark. Go read it. Now. It will make you happy. Or… very ill. Love you guys! Buh-bye!

Part I: Those Skettios Cans Are Mighty Clever

"Skettios, skettios, where the fook are the skettios…?!" Nny asked no one in particular as he rummaged around in his kitchen, throwing out the contents of the cabinets and whatnot in his search for the little pasta-rings in a can that he loved so much.

"C'mon, skettios, where are you?!" He opened the cabinet door closest to the rundown fridge. "Aha!" Lo and behold, a can of spaghettios was sitting there, just waiting to be eaten.

Nny grabbed them happily, pulled a small knife (well, smaller than what he usually used) from his trench coat pocket, and commenced to open the can. He dropped the knife in the sink and the can top in the trash before shoving the actual can into a grungy-looking microwave and turning the dial to one.

He pulled them out just as the microwave went *DING!*, shoved a spoon into the saucy pasta, and began eating, reading the label as he did so.

Suddenly, the spoon slipped from Johnny's hand as something on the can caught his eye. He read over it again.

_Blah, blah, blah, contest, blahblah, blaaah, blabbity, win an official Skettios brand spaghettios can-opener, blah-die, blah-die, blah! Blaaaaahblah, BLAH! Blah?! BLAAAAH!!! Send your name, address, phone number, and why YOU like Skettios brand spaghettios! Blaaaah!_

Johnny wasted no time reading the rest of the ad; he grabbed a pen, a paper, and an envelope and set to work on trying to put into words what made skettios so wonderfully marvelous to him.

Two hours and almost a whole notebook later, Nny had completed his masterpiece. He quickly added his name, address, and phone number, sealed it in the envelope (which he'd already addressed) and ran out to put it in the mailbox.

He smiled brightly as he put the flag up, then went back inside to finish his lunch, never bothering to read the fine print (actually, it wasn't that fine; he just didn't read much of it period) of the label-advertised contest…

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A blind date contest, hosted by Skettios, where you can win an official Skettios brand spaghettios can-opener, has just been created! Yaaaaaay, JOIN! Yes?! YEEEEES!!! Send your name, address, phone number, and why YOU like Skettios brand spaghettios! Yaaaaay! The two winners will receive the magical Skettios brand spaghettios can-opener, along with a special blind date with each other! Isn't that nifty?! SEND YOUR ENTRIES! NOOOOOW!!!


	2. Part II: I Didn't Ask For This...

Part II: I Didn't Ask For This…

For the next week, Nny waited patiently by the door, keeping watch for the mailman through a space between the boards over his windows, and finally the day came.

He had left his window seat for only a moment to throw away an old Brainfreezy cup that kept hitting him in the foot (there was a draft, and them styrofoam cups aren't very sturdy, people) when he heard the doorbell ring.

BZZZZZACK!!

Johnny rushed to the door excitedly and threw it open, but the person standing on his front step was definitely not the mailman.

He cocked his head to one side, looking at the dark skinned girl with her even darker hair, her green eyes gazing brightly back at him as she clutched a small skeleton toy to her chest.

"Hiii!" she said cheerfully, an insanely happy grin plastered on her face.

"Um… who are you?" Nny inquired, leaning against the doorframe.

"Your date!"

"… My _what_?"

"Your date!" The girl squeezed the skeleton toy and it squeaked loudly. "You won the Skettios contest! And so did I!"

"You're not a can-opener," Johnny said, confused.

"Nooo, I'm your blind date!" The girl handed him his Skettios brand spaghettios can-opener. "_That's_ the can-opener, silly." She squeaked the toy again.

"Blind.. date? I don't remember anything about a blind date…"

Johnny was torn from his thoughts as the girl grabbed him by the wrist and dragged him to the old, beat up Cadillac that had "SKETTIOS LIMO" painted on the side in bright orange letters.

Once inside, the driver started the car and they were off to wherever the magical Skettios Limo was taking them.

Johnny was still really confused. 

"But.. I didn't ask for this… I just wanted the can-opener!" He waved it over his head (well, sorta; the ceiling was pretty low). 

"Aww, too bad. I'm Tenna!" the girl replied. "And thiiiis is Spooky!" Another squeak from the toy.

"I'm.. Johnny. But you can call me Nny… I s'pose." He lowered the can-opener and stared at it for a moment before shoving it into his trench coat pocket.

"_The_ Johnny?" Tenna asked incredulously, staring at him. "As in the one Devi's always raaaving about?"

Nny stared back, his mouth hanging open in disbelief. 

"You know Devi?!"

"Of _course_," Tenna said, as if this was the most obvious thing in the world. "I'm only her bestest friend!"

Nny made a mental note here not to kill this girl, as that would only worsen the situation between him and Devi.

"Wow, I finally get to meet you! Isn't this just neat?!"

Johnny was taken completely aback when Tenna all of a sudden leaned over and hugged him tightly, cutting off his air supply.

He pushed against her, but she didn't budge until she willfully let go, and, as he caught his breath, he was wondering if he'd be able to kill her even if he wanted to.

"We're here. Get out. Now. NOOOW! Aaargh!!" the driver instructed, pointing to the large building to their right.

Johnny and Tenna climbed out and gazed up at the very tall building, Tenna squeaking Spooky repeatedly.

Johnny was about to snatch the annoying toy when a pudgy man in a tattered and dusty tuxedo approached them, scratching his nose.

"Nngh.. are you.. umm… the contest winners? Blergh…" 

Nny raised his eyebrow and reached for one of his cleverly hidden blades, but Tenna gave an excited "Yesss!" and the man nodded, sniffling.

"Arr..ghh.. this way, please…"

They followed the pudgy man into the squat, grungy building beside the tall one and were told to wait for someone to seat them.

Johnny was still flustered as they were lead to their "special" booth with something about skettios written on a banner hanging from the ceiling.

He had a feeling this was gonna be a really weird ass night.

I bet chu thought it was gonna be Devi, didn't you? Well then, I sure proved you wrong! Um.. I guess… Anyway, I'm sorry this chapter isn't much longer than the last, but I'm having trouble writing much of anything lately. Oh well. It'll go away. I hope.


End file.
